The Anti Q Day Report
Behavioural scientists have found that almost 30% of people will quit on their New Year's resolution by the third Friday of January dubbing it "Quitter's Day".
To be honest, I really don't like this narrative. Even if you "fail" (ie. don't do a habit that you've promised yourself to do) you have not failed, and you do not have to quit. The beauty of building new habits or creating change in your life is that you can start over again EVERY SINGLE day if you need to.
This year we asked our community what they find to be the hardest part of keeping your resolution, here is what some of them said:
- Harder time getting up early when it's still so dark out
- Remembering that taking time for me benefits the whole family
- Can't find the time to make healthy meals and end up eating fast food that makes me feel bad about myself
- Staying on a regime when I'm so tired
- Feeling like there isn't enough time in the day to do all the things like prepare healthy food, exercise, get good sleep etc
- Being accountable for oneself
- Reminding myself of why it's worth it, when I'm in the moment it seems easier to give up
- Making it a priority to cook good meals, too often I resort to ordering in unhealthy food
- Knee pain
- Finding the time with two little ones
- Treat days at work or social gatherings and not wanting to say no
- Fighting old habits
- Can't find time with a busy work schedule
It's clear to see why we find it so hard to implement new habits into our lives - How to fit it all in one day? How to find the time? How to combat being exhausted from life? What if we just do not have the will power to make the change?
Here's the thing... It's really f*#&ing hard. But the good news is that we can do hard things. It's not about our will power - It's about having the right systems in place that will allow us to follow the new changes with the least amount of resistance.
One of my favourite thought leaders to learn from is Mel Robbins - She is one of the greatest motivational speakers in my opinion not just because she is smart, funny, or articulate - It's because 15 years ago she hit rock bottom and she has dedicated her life since then to find ways to become the version of herself that she always wanted to be and has helped millions of people along the way.
Yesterday as I was driving home from the kitchen I listened to her podcast about the science of creating habits. If you have the time, I highly recommend listening to her entire list of January podcasts as they all relate to building habits and creating the change you want in your life - But if you only have a few minutes, here are the high points from her podcasts:
- Make the habit visible - Want to go to the gym first thing in the morning? Put your gym clothes next to your bed so that you trip over them when you wake up. Want to get serious about your hydration? Set out a gallon of water in front of your coffee machine so that it's the first thing you see in the kitchen. Want to be a more positive person? Put sticky notes on your bathroom mirror with love notes to yourself.
- Remove the "anti-habits" from your view - Do you want to stop drinking? Get rid of all the alcohol in your house, or put it somewhere out of view and hard to reach. Do you want to go to sleep earlier? Charge your phone in your bathroom, or living room, anywhere except for your bedroom. Want to quit sugar? Do not keep any in your kitchen, and at social/work gatherings bring a non-refined sugar option with you so that you can still enjoy the social time without breaking your promise to yourself.
- Track your progress - The only way that we can know if we are on track, is to track. Humans get an immense amount of satisfaction when we check off boxes. Build a chart (can be digital through an app like Habit Tracker or a physical one on paper) with all the things you want to do to build new habits. Tape it to your fridge. Track daily. It's okay if you miss a day, or even two, but do not let yourself miss three days in a row and start to visually see all of the changes you are making for yourself and celebrate this!
- Build a Plan - We can not do this alone in our heads. It's truly impossible. Research out of University of Austin proved that you are going to succeed at behaviour change if you make specific plans to implement it by 60%. Failure to plan is planning to fail. Decide what you want to change, and build a plan that you can follow. Only have 20
- Do it in the Morning - The system that no one wants to hear, but that everyone needs to hear, is to do it in the morning. It's that simple. As much as we want to stay in our toasty bed, getting the most important things done in the morning is VITAL to building new habits. Have kids at home? Wake up 30 minutes before they do so that you have that time for yourself. Find it impossible to wake up before the sun? Get a lamp that mimics the sunlight in your room. Use loud music. Use Mel's 5-4-3-2-1 rule to get your ass out of bed. Whatever you need to do, wake up earlier, you're worth it.
Not sure where to start?
Book in a free 15 minute call with me here. Outside of cooking, my passion is helping people design the systems they need in their life to create the habits required to change their lifestyle for the better.
Create the plan - You deserve it.